We write to the e-paper of record of the ancestral home of Famiglia Danza to express our unwavering dedication to increasing public recognition and acclaim for Tony Danza, the most illustrious scion of your fair municipality, and to most vigorously protest the scandalous libel that you directed towards him in your recent article, "50 Most Loathsome New Yorkers." Your unsupported insinuations completely miss the mark; while Mr. Danza is certainly a New Yorker, he deserves only the highest commendation--and little, if any, loathing.
We therefore ask all citizens to join us in urging the town of Hollywood, California to honor Mr. Danza with a star on the famous Hollywood Walk of Fame on Hollywood Boulevard. We recognize that a "Tony Danza" star already exists there, but it is obvious, in light of Mr. Danzaís great body of quality thespian performances, and especially his fairly-recent star turn as Host and Master of Ceremonies of the Miss America Pageant, that he deserves another one.
If you appreciate the clear propriety of our message, please write to, shout at, send a telegram for, emit smoke signals in the general direction of, or otherwise correspond with the town elders of Hollywood to demand that Mr. Danza be properly honored.
THE JEWISH MEN'S RAP GROUP
Raphael Goldman, Ombudsman & Late Nite Manager
Mark Graham, Shammes & Hamburglar
J. Irving Israel, President Pro Tem & Gabbai
Daniel Kennemer, Scout & Consigliare
Joshua Safran, Seargent-at-Arms & C.F.O.
Joseph H. Schwartz, Rector-Whip & Chief Justice
D. L. Strolovitch, Scrivener-Archivist & Commander-in-Chief